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Reasons to be Cheerful...

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alias author Jan Hawke

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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Reasons to be Cheerful...
    Posted: 18 May 2010 at 3:48pm

Reasons to be Cheerful...

Did you know that you're stronger than you think? That no matter what happens to you, what obstacles in life you encounter, you CAN get through them, even make them work for you?
If you've watched the vid link already then you know why I'm saying this. If you haven't seen the vid yet, despite reading this far
LOOK AT THE VID!

I dare you NOT to be affected by what this wonderful person has to say about how to really live!
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Saranna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 11:23am
Jano just recently told me about this guy - a pang of shame followed, but yes it's true we can all be and do more than we believe.  Not to hijack the thread, Oh She Who I Always Obey, but maybe we could each post one or two things that are among our own reasons to be happy?  I'll start;
 
Life led me away from a destructive relationship and into the safety of a loving one.
Death comes to all
But great achievements raise a monument
Which shall endure until the sun grows cold.
- George Fabricius, 'In Praise of Georgius Agricola'
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 3:23pm
Please do - Nick doesn't claim to have all the answers as everyone's different and everyone can be inspiring as well.
 
Whatever gets you through is (mostly) my motto Wink
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Miah Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 4:14pm
Thanks for making me cry Jano! Cry

Good video though

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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 4:43pm
It's good crying though - he's a remarkable person and once you're over the main shock, his face and words stop you thinking about his deformities and it's easy to see how he's conquered his limitations just by looking at his own attitude and focusing on what he does have to give to himself first and then to other people  Smile
 
There is a shame/pity factor as Saranna says yes, but he's all about getting over that and living the one life we get as fully as we can. How I'm taking it along with the other things that have happening around me for the last 6 months is to try to 'seize the day' as much as it's possible for you and to 'DO' or least find ways to 'DO' as soon as you can and not think about it and find reasons 'NOT' to do that today...
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Miah Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 4:54pm
He is remarkable, and to think of all the challenges he had to deal with just blows my mind. I saw a similar video of a woman with no arms who was able to care for her children, and I'm talking changing diapers and folding laundry with her feet. And I found it so freakin amazing how many things a person can do with their feet and toes! I'll see if I can find it...
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 9:32pm
I guess I'm the only one not inspired by this...
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 May 2010 at 10:26pm
Maybe you don't need it or just lucky then.
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Juggler Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 May 2010 at 8:25pm

When I first joined this forum I asked all the people who already knew me to keep a little secret for me.

 
On the 1st November 2009 I suffered what I now know to be a fairly serious stroke. I have lost the use of my right hand side and I am naturally right handed. In the same year I lost my partner of 14 years so when I joined this forum I fancied a new start.
 

Over the last few weeks I seemed to be getting worse and in a series of MSN conversations I think I got Jan to the point where she was looking for a tall building to throw herself off if I told her any more ‘’ listen to me and how poorly I am’’ stories.

 
Well I did send her a 'woe is me' email and in true Jan style she sent me the link to the Nick Vujicic film clip. She entitled her email to me ‘’The killer left hook’’ Well for me it was. I watched it twice to see if it made me cry a second time and it did. At that point I decided that things were going to change.

 
The disabilities I have will be with me for the rest of my life. What won’t be with me anymore is the self pity I was dragging behind them.
 

To say Nick Vujicic is inspirational is like saying Bobby Charlton was a good footballer or David Gilmour could handle a guitar. Quite how Nick Vujicic gets through a day is beyond me but to get through each day and give hope and inspiration as he obviously did to the school hall full of kids and to me, in my book makes him a very special person.

 
I needed to take a step sideways and re-examine where I was going. If it hadn’t been for Jan sending me the email it could have easily been the old folk’s home.
 

From now on everyday is going to be better than the day before it might only be a very small step but one thing is for certain it will be a step forward.

Me.......I'm just a lawnmower you can tell me by the way I walk.
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  Quote Doughnut Jimmy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 May 2010 at 9:09pm
I'm sorry to hear you've been getting worse Juggler but its good to know you've found some inspiration to battle on.Thumbs Up
The road goes ever on and on
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 May 2010 at 11:40pm
Maybe thats just it, maybe I'm not inspired by this because to me, complaining has nothing to do with giving up. I say the same to my friends at martial arts training. Just cuz I say something hurt, doesnt mean I'm going to stop fighting. I guess I just tend to keep hitting and kicking while I'm complaining. Like a buckety car that makes a lot of noise even if theres still half a tank left. Perhaps those inspirational "dont give up on yourself" videos have no effect on me cuz I wouldnt "give up" in a dozen lifetimes. Either that or I have a really egocentrical mind and a stone heart, upto you to decide how you see me.Tongue
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  Quote Juggler Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 May 2010 at 11:58pm

Well if you’re the type of guy who never gives up in my opinion you’ll do very well for yourself Kris. The easy way of course is to give up and sadly too many people of your age do precisely that. I’ll be honest with you and admit I nearly gave into my situation but luckily I have some very good friends and giving up was never really an option.

If you have the courage of your own convictions and you never give up then all things are possible Kris and more power to you for having that inner strength.Thumbs Up

Me.......I'm just a lawnmower you can tell me by the way I walk.
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 12:22am
What are you talking about? I almost gave up too, but I didnt and neither did you. You beat it didnt you? It doesnt matter wether you merely pull through or win by a landslide, in this case as long as your not dead, your still alive. (and dont lemme hear you laugh about that one.Tongue)
Jan's like a national bank of bitchin cuz Ive done my fair share lately too. Its helped me alot along with a few others.
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  Quote Juggler Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 12:55am

I’ll be honest Kris with two major blows and with one of them affecting my ability to think and reason I very nearly lost it. Without my friends I’d be in a home now. Without Jan’s bank to draw out of I’d be in mental hospital.

If you had no idea from all my previous posts that Id had a stroke then I agree with you and I’ve not given up and I’m still fighting. I’m not sure I’ll get to do martial arts but you never know.

It’s good to have another opinion and one from someone of your age. I’m nearly 58 and just about old enough to be your Grandpa. Most of the teenagers I see in Manchester don’t have your spirit and as I said before I think you’ll do OK for yourselfThumbs Up.

If you ever need any advice from an old fart then I’ll be more than happy to give you my thoughts but for tonight thank you for yours. I need to sleep now. The curse of old ageEmbarrassed

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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 1:40am
I'm afraid I might be getting a beating from Jano for comming across too tough here.Tongue
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 1:53am
Not necessarily, but I'm up too late so I'll let you stew until tomorrow! Evil Smile 
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 1:56am

By the way, did you see Happy Feet yet Jan?

If your in need to watch something funny, watch that movie!
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  Quote Juggler Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 1:59am

I can’t speak for Jan but you’ve said nothing that has made me upset Kris. We all have different opinions and as long as they are put politely I never have a problem with anyone.

Jan was very tough with me. The link to the video was only a tiny part of her email. For months I had been going on and on about how tough life was learning to do everything all over again. Jan listened to all of it but when the time came it was Jan’s down to earth comments that made me stop feeling sorry for myself and do something about it.Clap

You weren’t too far off the mark Kris when you said at least I’m alive.

Alive and kicking from now onLOL

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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 2:10am
Wacko What is this touchy feely fest - LOL 

I'm off to bed now - try not to get too competitve with the positive feedback Tongue
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
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  Quote Juggler Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 2:19am
Good idea Jan.....I got up at 6am on Sunday and its now nearly 2.30am
 
Goodnight all ZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzLOL
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 12:20pm
Jeez Louise Wacko  Blokes really are another species! LOL
 
Now - let's get this citation/application for becoming the patron Saint of B*tchin' nailed? Smile
 
Regardless of how you arrive in this world, how you learn to be a human being and how you are with other people is affected by all manner of things. However, it's how you learn to deal with setbacks and triumphs too, that defines you as a person and also how other people see you. The people here who come from the Terry Pratchett site knew about Nick already, because that's where I saw him first as well. Some very strong personalities on there, BUT, they are also people who have come together through an admiration for Terry Pratchett and his work AND HIS ATTITUDE to succumbing to a form of Alzheimer's disease that, for an author could have been devastating and so far is winning his battle and still writing marvellous books that are very funny indeed, but also have messages for people on how some things are just wrong. All of the people on there who responded to the post that linked to the video we have at the top were all impressed in different ways, by how positive and happy Nick is.
 
Terry's fight to keep himself from sliding into what he sees as an erosion of who and what he is has, like Nick, had phases where he's angry and in despair. What they both have in common as people living with what appear to be terrible disabilities, is attitude. Nick has turned his condition into an example in effect of how to deal with the cards you're dealt.  He has faith in a christian god and this has strengthened his determination to do as much as he possibly can to make his way in this world and be happy and to help others to achieve that too. Have a look at his entry in Wikipedia. And then maybe have a look at more of his vids and see that this is much more than 'Halleluljah, God Loves You' hype. He had to find his own way and his faith sustained him for sure, but the drive and strength to achieve what he has done, had to come from himself in the first instance.
 
Terry is famous for being an atheist. This is not strictly true, or not anymore. In recent interviews he's spoken about spirituality and he is certainly a person who can be and accepts the title of a humanist, which is to some extent an acceptance that the spirit of being human is something to be embraced in life, and to live your life well for yourself and for other people in effect. His own fight or cause has evolved on two fronts both of which encompass acceptance of what is left to him as an 'author with a message' to investigate, fund and lobby to make Alzheimers and it's associated condition better understood by others and to make conditions better for the people who 'lose' themselves - and for the people who care for them, and have to watch someone they love crumble away from the inside.
The other front is to champion those who have terminal conditions of  any kind who face the future in the knowledge that they will come to a point where they will have no quality of life whatsoever and their continued existence will be a unbearable burden to people they love who care for them. This is called euthanasia or assisted suicide under UK law and doctors and relatives can be prosecuted and serve a lengthy prison sentence for helping someone to die before their bodies or minds peter out of their own accord. Terry calls this process assisted death, not suicide. He is campaigning for assisted death to be made legal for those who wish to take power over their last days and leave this life in dignity and peace, without prolonging pain or threatening their own or their carer's mental wellbeing. Have a look at his entry in Wikipedia
 
These are two remarkable, vital and intelligent people who are both inspirational in different ways and I'll happily admit that they inspire me something rotten. Smile Assisted death and striving to the best of your ability to live life to the full, no matter the limitations, may at first seem to be contradictory, but acceptance comes into the equation of both these philosophies and so they both give hope to people who face terrible hurdles to achieve a contentment in their lot because in the end it comes down to your own responsibility for your own happiness.
 
Terrible hurdles - yours may not seem to be that terrible when you compare them to what Nick or Terry has had to tackle. In a way Nick's 'lucky' in that he's had to fight being limbless from the moment he was born, so he's used to the struggle and has been able to grow into somebody worthwhile who can cope - with his 'little chicken drumstick' - remarkably well. If he didn't have that little chicken drumstick he might not be able to cope as well, but he still has his mind, his voice and most of all his attitude to get him through.
Terry faces something that is slowly changing him from who he has become by his own efforts against his will. That is appalling to my mind, because you do 'lose' yourself as a person in effect. 'Luckily' Terry is a wealthy and highly respected man whose form of the disease does not effect memory so much as motor skills and co-ordination. He too has attitude which is part of his appeal to fans of his books and of his crusades to make the final days of your life 'survivable' until that ceases to be an object.
 
Those are their terrible hurdles and how they jump them every day. Anybody can do this and the fact is that you do it without knowing most of the time. You find your own way and as you do that, you also find support along the way. Different supports for everyone, but a constant for all of us I think, is that we do need the support of family and friends. I share a terrible hurdle with a lot of people here - depression. It is not a co-incidence that a lot of people on this and other forums I've been on, share this hurdle. In the end all hurdles are the same because they're hard for you. On a forum like this or Terry Pratchett's and in other places like Instant Messaging services, Twitter or Facebook - whatever suits you - you find great friends in a very real sense, not a 'collecting' one. To some extent it's easy online to become 'yourself' again and to be the person you want to be.
 
Find your own reasons to be cheerful and embrace them, whether that's by sharing your life and experiences openly; being this brilliant open and giving elleth that 'everyone' loves; responding to people who are in trouble for whatever reason and giving them help and reassurance - or just an ear (and an opinion, if that's what they're asking for); speak for others who don't have a voice and you do; learning to shave yourself even though you don't have arms or legs, but are lucky enough to have a little 2-toed foot... You do it already in all kinds of ways don't you? Wink
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 2:18pm
what?
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 2:48pm

I'm saying what you said more or less - we all save ourselves in the end. We just fight in different ways. And choose different heroes as well... mine is Terry and now Nick, because I can be as great as they are in my own way.

The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Kris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 3:59pm
Shall I chop off your legs so you can be more like your messiah?Wink
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 7:54pm

Wacko *shakes head* I know you're joking Kris - other's who don't know you so well may read that differently. There's a time and a place to tease and if you'd have said that to me on MSN or on PM I'd be still laughing.

I don't believe in any god like Nick so by definition I don't believe in messiahs. But I do admire his messsage, as I do Terry Pratchett's and also his books. I admire Tolkien's books and his achievements and morality too. Is it not alright to have heroes or role models?
 
This is a thread about finding reasons to be 'cheerful' even when things look bleak and hopeless. My depression, my dodgy knees, my damaged lungs, my pathetic excuse of a marriage and my inability to conceive or have children are my 'missing limbs'. Are my terrible hurdles. Finding out about other people who can overcome their difficulties in some way is inspirational to me. Other people have looked at this and taken different things from it.
 
You don't see it that way, which is fine. You've said so and we've discussed it. If you want to discuss it some more - also fine. But don't make disrespectful comments, even if they're not meant to offend the person they're directed at, in a thread like this - other people may interpret it differently and see it as deliberately disrespectful. If you've something constructive or pertinent to add to the discussion then please stay. Otherwise find a better way of using your time in a thread were friendly banter is more suited please.
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Doughnut Jimmy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 May 2010 at 10:15pm

I’m having serious difficulties trying to explain what I mean in this post so plese bear with me if its not very coherent.


For me not giving up and being cheerful are worlds apart and the latter is much harder to consistently find reasons for. (I don’t just mean having a laugh or being up beat and bubbly when people are around, I mean honestly being content with and positive about life). For this once I get stuck in the rut of having no enthusiasm I have to get right away from it and throw myself up a few mountains until my brain reboots and rediscovers the fact that there is beauty in the world and challenges that are worth throwing yourself at not just enduring.


So why be cheerful - there are wild places in this world completely unphased by all our trials and tribulations.

The road goes ever on and on
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 May 2010 at 11:29pm
Cheerful is as cheerful does, or some such granny-type saying! LOL 
 
You hit it on the head anyway DJ and very coherently. If you're happy all the time then you're a very unusual person, possibly a baby (who never gets nappy rash and has a team of nannies to anticipate your every need LOL) or have a serious screw loose in your noggin and/or are on mind-altering drugs of the finest and purest quality... Wacko
 
There's no magic wand for these things and the thing that struck me most about Nick in some of the other vids that are on YouTube, is that he's really honest about his life even now, and of course he's not going to be bobbing about being all bright and breezy the whole time. But he has set himself free from false expectations and his 'buzz' is, I think, being around people and communicating and helping them if he can. 
 
He set himself achievable goals and planned on how he could be as self-sufficient and also as independant physically and financially as he could manage. It must have been hard work, and still must be to sustain his business and to give to others as well - the touchy feely bits may be cringeworthy for some people (well they did me) but you have to be a very strong person to be able to deal with people's reactions doing that - it's hard to be compassionate and in some ways I think he's a little like a MacMillan or Marie Curie nurse (for non-UK peeps they specialise in caring for terminal cancer patients and their families) where you have to keep some objectivity, whilst being as understanding and giving as you can in horrible and hopeless situations. That's not exactly what Nick does, but there's a limit to how much someone can 'give' of themselves essentially. 
 
I do so agree with you about having space to look around and breathe and take in something that's worthwhile or calming or beautiful and get yourself realigned and able to carry on knowing that its not all toil and struggle the whole time. Sometimes I think you need to stop fighting yourself in order to achieve contentment and peace with what life's dealt you - it's not about running around grinning inanely all the time. It's about inner strength and a reason to be, not cheerful exactly,  but able to be human and enjoy it more.
 
Here's some more 'reasons to be cheerful' according to the late and always very interesting Mr Ian Dury (without the repeats and chorus Wink) have highlighted some of mine -
 
Summer, Buddy Holly, the working folly
Good golly Miss Molly and boats
Hammersmith Palais, the Bolshoi Ballet
Jump back in the alley and nanny goats

18-wheeler Scammels, Domenecker camels
All other mammals
plus equal votes
Seeing Piccadilly, Fanny Smith and Willy
Being rather silly, and porridge oats

A bit of grin and bear it, a bit of come and share it
You're welcome, we can spare it
- yellow socks
Too short to be haughty, too nutty to be naughty
Going on 40 - no electric shocks

The juice of the carrot, the smile of the parrot
A little drop of claret - anything that rocks
Elvis and Scotty, days when I ain't spotty,
Sitting on the potty - curing smallpox
Health service glasses
Gigolos and brasses
round or skinny bottoms

Take your mum to paris
lighting up the chalice
wee willy harris

Bantu Stephen Biko, listening to Rico
Harpo, Groucho, Chico

Cheddar cheese and pickle, the Vincent motorsickle
Slap and tickle
Woody Allen
, Dali, Dimitri and Pasquale
balabalabala and Volare

Something nice to study, phoning up a buddy
Being in my nuddy
Saying hokey-dokey, singalonga Smokey
Coming out of chokey

John Coltrane's soprano, Adi Celentano
Bonar Colleano
sourced from artists.letssingit.com
 
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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  Quote Saranna Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 May 2010 at 3:37pm
Reasons to be cheerful - 2 - threads like this in which people from all over the world feel able to share things that help.  Thanks everyone.
 
Reasons to be cheerful -3- my cat
Death comes to all
But great achievements raise a monument
Which shall endure until the sun grows cold.
- George Fabricius, 'In Praise of Georgius Agricola'
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Ceregorn View Drop Down
Dreamcatcher
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Joined: 20 Jan 2010
Location: Northumberland
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Posts: 87
  Quote Ceregorn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 May 2010 at 11:52pm
I can usually think of many reasons to be cheerful, like Saranna my cat (Oscar) is amongst them, but more than anything else the one thing that cheers me up when all else is doom and gloom... No matter how long I live, no matter what strange and wonderful innovations the future brings us, at no point in my future timeline will I ever have to be 16 years old again. I honestly can't tell you how much of a relief that is. If you knew the sixteen year old me, you'd be relieved for me too. Wink
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Jano View Drop Down
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alias author Jan Hawke

Joined: 27 Dec 2008
Location: Dunheved Kernow
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  Quote Jano Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 May 2010 at 12:21am
Ye gods yeah! It's  actually a horrible age - you can even get married with parental permission Dead - which is actually amazing 'cos heaven knows where you can find a coherent balanced 16 yr old let alone one you'd want to marry LOL 
The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one
will do ~ Thomas Jefferson
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